self quarantine coronavirus journal – day 34

Saturday, April 18th 2020:

Did everyone have a fun Saturday? Good. Did I? No. I had to work. For a job/project that I am working on, I ended up working from about 6pm Saturday to 4am Sunday. Sometimes things like this take a lot of hand holding and I had to do it right. But good news is that i got it done and all should be okay. Most likely I missed something and I will have to settle it in the morning. I didn’t even eat dinner I was working on this for so long. But that’s how it goes. What was i working on? Well even if I tried to explain it now in a blog, I would probably bore you to death. Instead let’s chat about something else. Yesterday we talked about the importance of staying in the quarantine and targeting a key word…safety. Today I want to talk about the weird side effects that this quarantine is having on me. Maybe they are happening to you too. For me, what is getting me the weird dreams I am having. Anyone else having strange dreams? Like last night, my dream was that I was sort of tailgating with all my family. Cousins, aunts and uncles, and lot of family I haven’t seen in a while. But we were tailgating in a parking lot of an airport. Yea, strange right? All my family that was there were all getting along, bbq’ing and I could hear and feel the business of the airport around us. The planes taking off and voices over loud speakers. As my dream went on it turns out we are waiting for the others to arrive. According to my cousin in my dream, he said “it is going to be so good to see everyone when they get here”. What I ended up figuring out by observation was that anyone in my family that has passed away, was somehow going to show up on some flight and we were all here ready to greet them and pick them up. We had balloons, music blasting, everything! When I got the feeling of happiness that my mother was coming, I began to get excited. And it seemed with every person that would exit the terminal that we were waiting by, the anticipation just got a little bit higher and higher. Waiting for the next person to walk out the terminal just began to kill me. I knew deep inside she was gone and not coming back. And when I had that feeling run across my heart, one of my cousins says to me “if you think that way, then none of them arrive”. He can hear my thoughts? I was tripping. Then it seemed to happen. One of my cousins did a dead sprint and sure enough it was our grandmother. I was frozen, then I got so excited…that I woke up. I couldn’t go back to sleep but wow. What strange dream. But I have had at least 4 strange dreams this past week.

I wish I could talk to others and see if I am the only one going through this or if they are as well. I really hope not and that everyone is okay. I am okay. Just having weird dreams.

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